Death is the solution to all problems. No man - no problem. Joseph Stalin
Death solves all problems - no man, no problem. Joseph Stalin
Education is a weapon whose effects depend on who holds it in his hands and at whom it is aimed. Joseph Stalin
Everyone imposes his own system as far as his army can reach. Joseph Stalin
Gaiety is the most outstanding feature of the Soviet Union. Joseph Stalin
Gratitude is a sickness suffered by dogs. Joseph Stalin
History shows that there are no invincible armies. Joseph Stalin
I believe in one thing only, the power of human will. Joseph Stalin
I trust no one, not even myself. Joseph Stalin
Ideas are more powerful than guns. We would not let our enemies have guns, why should we let them have ideas. Joseph Stalin
If any foreign minister begins to defend to the death a "peace conference," you can be sure his government has already placed its orders for new battleships and airplanes. Joseph Stalin
If the opposition disarms, well and good. If it refuses to disarm, we shall disarm it ourselves. Joseph Stalin
In the Soviet army it takes more courage to retreat than advance. Joseph Stalin
It is enough that the people know there was an election. The people who cast the votes decide nothing. The people who count the votes decide everything. Joseph Stalin
Mankind is divided into rich and poor, into property owners and exploited; and to abstract oneself from this fundamental division; and from the antagonism between poor and rich means abstracting oneself from fundamental facts. Joseph Stalin
One death is a tragedy; one million is a statistic. Joseph Stalin
Print is the sharpest and the strongest weapon of our party. Joseph Stalin
The death of one man is a tragedy. The death of millions is a statistic. Joseph Stalin
The only real power comes out of a long rifle. Joseph Stalin
All that we are is the result of what we have thought. If a man speaks or acts with an evil thought, pain follows him. If a man speaks or acts with a pure thought, happiness follows him, like a shadow that never leaves him. Buddha
All wrong-doing arises because of mind. If mind is transformed can wrong-doing remain? Buddha
An insincere and evil friend is more to be feared than a wild beast; a wild beast may wound your body, but an evil friend will wound your mind. Buddha
Better than a thousand hollow words, is one word that brings peace. Buddha
Chaos is inherent in all compounded things. Strive on with diligence. Buddha
Do not dwell in the past, do not dream of the future, concentrate the mind on the present moment. Buddha
Do not overrate what you have received, nor envy others. He who envies others does not obtain peace of mind. Buddha
Even death is not to be feared by one who has lived wisely. Buddha
Hatred does not cease by hatred, but only by love; this is the eternal rule. Buddha
He who loves 50 people has 50 woes; he who loves no one has no woes. Buddha
Health is the greatest gift, contentment the greatest wealth, faithfulness the best relationship. Buddha
Holding on to anger is like grasping a hot coal with the intent of throwing it at someone else; you are the one who gets burned. Buddha
However many holy words you read, however many you speak, what good will they do you if you do not act on upon them? Buddha
I do not believe in a fate that falls on men however they act; but I do believe in a fate that falls on them unless they act. Buddha
I never see what has been done; I only see what remains to be done. Buddha
In a controversy the instant we feel anger we have already ceased striving for the truth, and have begun striving for ourselves. Buddha
In the sky, there is no distinction of east and west; people create distinctions out of their own minds and then beleive them to be true. Buddha
It is a man's own mind, not his enemy or foe, that lures him to evil ways. Buddha
It is better to conquer yourself than to win a thousand battles. Then the victory is yours. It cannot be taken from you, not by angels or by demons, heaven or hell. Buddha
Bart, with $10,000, we'd be millionaires! We could buy all kinds of useful things like...love!
Just because I don't care doesn't mean I don't understand.
I'm normally not a praying man, but if you're up there, please save me Superman.
Son, if you really want something in this life, you have to work for it. Now quiet! They're about to announce the lottery numbers.
Well, it's 1 a.m. Better go home and spend some quality time with the kids.
Maybe, just once, someone will call me 'Sir' without adding, 'You're making a scene.'
Marge, don't discourage the boy! Weaseling out of things is important to learn. It's what separates us from the animals! Except the weasel.
Doughnuts. Is there anything they can't do?
You know, boys, a nuclear reactor is a lot like a woman. You just have to read the manual and press the right buttons.
Lisa, if you don't like your job you don't strike. You just go in every day and do it really half-assed. That's the American way.
When will I learn? The answer to life's problems aren't at the bottom of a bottle, they're on TV!
Son, when you participate in sporting events, it's not whether you win or lose: it's how drunk you get.
I'm going to the back seat of my car, with the woman I love, and I won't be back for ten minutes!
[Meeting Aliens] Please don't eat me! I have a wife and kids. Eat them!
What do we need a psychiatrist for? We know our kid is nuts.
Marge, you're as beautiful as Princess Leia and as smart as Yoda.
Kids, you tried your best and you failed miserably. The lesson is, never try.
The only monster here is the gambling monster that has enslaved your mother! I call him Gamblor, and it's time to snatch your mother from his neon claws!
When I look at the smiles on all the children's faces, I just know they're about to jab me with something.
I'm having the best day of my life, and I owe it all to not going to Church!
Lisa, if the Bible has taught us nothing else, and it hasn't, it's that girls should stick to girls sports, such as hot oil wrestling and foxy boxing and such and such.
I'm not a bad guy! I work hard, and I love my kids. So why should I spend half my Sunday hearing about how I'm going to Hell?
Getting out of jury duty is easy. The trick is to say you're prejudiced against all races.
It's not easy to juggle a pregnant wife and a troubled child, but somehow I managed to fit in eight hours of TV a day.
Lisa, Vampires are make-believe, like elves, gremlins, and eskimos.
I want to share something with you: The three little sentences that will get you through life. Number 1: Cover for me. Number 2: Oh, good idea, Boss! Number 3: It was like that when I got here.
Oh, people can come up with statistics to prove anything, Kent. 14% of people know that.
Remember that postcard Grandpa sent us from Florida of that Alligator biting that woman's bottom? That's right, we all thought it was hilarious. But, it turns out we were wrong. That alligator was sexually harrassing that woman.
Old people don't need companionship. They need to be isolated and studied so it can be determined what nutrients they have that might be extracted for our personal use.
How is education supposed to make me feel smarter? Besides, every time I learn something new, it pushes some old stuff out of my brain. Remember when I took that home winemaking course, and I forgot how to drive?
Television! Teacher, mother, secret lover.
Homer no function beer well without.
I've always wondered if there was a god. And now I know there is -- and it's me.
Kill my boss? Do I dare live out the American dream?
If something goes wrong at the plant, blame the guy who can't speak English.
I'm never going to be disabled. I'm sick of being so healthy.
I like my beer cold, my TV loud and my homosexuals flaming.
[Looking at a globe map...country being Uruguay] Hee hee! Look at this country! 'You-are-gay.'
All my life I've had one dream, to achieve my many goals.
Dad, you've done a lot of great things, but you're a very old man, and old people are useless.
But Marge, what if we chose the wrong religion? Each week we just make God madder and madder.
I think Smithers picked me because of my motivational skills. Everyone says they have to work a lot harder when I'm around.
Dear Lord.. The gods have been good to me. For the first time in my life, everything is absolutely perfect just the way it is. So here's the deal: You freeze everything the way it is, and I won't ask for anything more. If that is OK, please give me absolutely no sign. OK, deal.
That's it! You people have stood in my way long enough. I'm going to clown college!
Beer: The cause of, and solution to, all of life's problems.
If something's hard to do, then it's not worth doing
I'm in no condition to drive...wait! I shouldn't listen to myself, I'm drunk!
A minute of perfection was worth the effort. A moment was the most you could ever expect from perfection. Chuck Palahniuk All God does is watch us and kill us when we get boring. We must never, ever be boring. Chuck Palahniuk Did perpetual happiness in the Garden of Eden maybe get so boring that eating the apple was justified? Chuck Palahniuk Every woman is just a different kind of problem. Chuck Palahniuk Everyone smiles with that invisible gun to their head. Chuck Palahniuk Find out what you're afraid of and go live there. Chuck Palahniuk Game shows are designed to make us feel better about the random, useless facts that are all we have left of our education. Chuck Palahniuk Give me rampant intellectualism as a coping mechanism. Chuck Palahniuk I don't care what they do with my book so long as the flippin check clears. Chuck Palahniuk I just don't want to die without a few scars. Chuck Palahniuk I used to work in a funeral home to feel good about myself, just the fact that I was breathing. Chuck Palahniuk I wanted to write about the moment when your addictions no longer hide the truth from you. When your whole life breaks down. That's the moment when you have to somehow choose what your life is going to be about. Chuck Palahniuk If death meant just leaving the stage long enough to change costume and come back as a new character, would you slow down? Or speed up? Chuck Palahniuk If I can't be beautiful, I want to be invisible. Chuck Palahniuk If I could wake up in a different place, at a different time, could I wake up as a different person? Chuck Palahniuk If you don't know what you want, you end up with a lot you don't. Chuck Palahniuk It's funny how you never think about the women you've had. It's always the ones who get away that you can't forget. Chuck Palahniuk Masochism is a valuable job skill. Chuck Palahniuk Maybe humans are just the pet alligators that God flushed down the toilet. Chuck Palahniuk Maybe we have to break everything to make something better out of ourselves. Chuck Palahniuk
More and more, it feels like I'm doing a really bad impersonation of myself. Chuck Palahniuk No matter how much you think you love somebody, you'll step back when the pool of their blood edges up too close. Chuck Palahniuk Only through destroying myself can I discover the greater power of my spirit. Chuck Palahniuk Our Generation has had no Great war, no Great Depression. Our war is spiritual. Our depression is our lives. Chuck Palahniuk People don't want their lives fixed. Nobody wants their problems solved. Their dramas. Their distractions. Their stories resolved. Their messed cleaned up. Because what would they have left? Just the big scary unknown. Chuck Palahniuk People have to really suffer before they can risk doing what they love. Chuck Palahniuk People used what they called a telephone because they hated being close together and they were scared of being alone. Chuck Palahniuk Reality means you live until you die. The real truth is nobody wants reality. Chuck Palahniuk Since change is constant, you wonder if people crave death because it's the only way they can get anything really finished. Chuck Palahniuk Sometimes the past seems too big for the present to hold. Chuck Palahniuk Sometimes you do something, and you get screwed. Sometimes it's the things you don't do, and you get screwed. Chuck Palahniuk Sticking feathers up your butt does not make you a chicken. Chuck Palahniuk That saying, about how you always kill the thing you love, well, it works both ways. Chuck Palahniuk The answer is there is no answer. Chuck Palahniuk The lower you fall, the higher you'll fly. Chuck Palahniuk The only difference between suicide and martyrdom is press coverage. Chuck Palahniuk The only way to find true happiness is to risk being completely cut open. Chuck Palahniuk The trick to forgetting the big picture is to look at everything close-up. Chuck Palahniuk We all die. The goal isn't to live forever, the goal is to create something that will. Chuck Palahniuk We are not special. We are not crap or trash, either. We just are. We just are, and what happens just happens. Chuck Palahniuk
What we don't understand we can make mean anything. Chuck Palahniuk When did the future switch from being a promise to a threat? Chuck Palahniuk Where would Jesus be if no one had written the gospels? Chuck Palahniuk Why is it you feel like a dope if you laugh alone, but that's usually how you end up crying? Chuck Palahniuk You are not a beautiful, unique snowflake... This is your life, and it's ending one minute at a time. Chuck Palahniuk You have a choice. Live or die. Every breath is a choice. Every minute is a choice. To be or not to be. Chuck Palahniuk You must realize that one day you will die. Until then you are worthless. Chuck Palahniuk Your birth is a mistake you'll spend your whole life trying to correct. Chuck Palahniuk
